Endurance?

I can no longer walk up or down the stairs like a normal person. I took one steps down and had to stop because it was so painful. I literally sat on the stairs and scooted down one step at a time, supporting myself with my hands and my right leg. If I put any weight at all on my left, my knee started screaming at me. Walking over level surfaces seemed to be ok though. It still hurt, yes, but not that screaming, piercing "I hate you" hurt. Just an ache.

Coming back up the stairs again? I had to nearly crawl, holding onto the rail to help pull myself up, along with putting a hand on the risers above and putting as much weight as possible on my arms and off of my left leg. My appointment on Friday cannot possible come fast enough. I need prescription pain medication and a solution. I don't think I care what it is at this point, I just need something so I can function like a normal human. If it means a cane and cutting down my hours at work, then there's no other solution and that's what I have to do. I know work will want me to just "suck it up and deal" but I can't. I just can't. Over the counter pain medication isn't touching it at all. My store manager is in tomorrow, I'll ask him if we can work something out.

On another note, I think that "t" ending in Akhenatet is meant to differentiate me from Akhenaten. It's a feeling I suppose. Aten is genderless so these is no true need for a feminised form, but I am not and don't want anyone to think I am associated with Akhenaten. Maybe it was preemptive?

If I finish the beginners class, I will become Remetj, and at that point I can be named, and perhaps move on to being a full Shemsu. I know that Akhenatet is only a temporary name for now, and the idea of being named properly is exciting. But it is also some time down the road, so I don't want to dwell on that. First thing first, and that is acceptance into the beginner class.

I don't know what to do with myself right now. I bagged some of the left over junk in the backyard left by the previous tenants. I let Jack out as I was hanging laundry, then I had a nap. I don't feel any more rested, it was just something to pass the time, that's all. I am hungry now, but haven't decided what to eat. Plus, that requires going down the stairs again which is turning into... an ordeal.

I miss talking to Laura and I feel so out of place and bored and lost when I can't talk to her. I don't want to dwell on that either though because it'll just make me feel worse.

I am trying to find a bright side, really I am.

Senebty.